Curious about how to get started with your kinky journey? Wonder no more! I recently wrote up an intro article with some helpful advice and tips for newbies, as well as pitfalls to avoid. Here is the article if you are curious. Feel free to share it if you think it can help others.
I am out of the closet. With a vengeance. I took the damn thing right off the hinges. Nobody can out me, nobody can threaten me, nobody can affect my job or family. I have no children. I will never run for political office. I have already quite successfully outed myself. There is no way that my personal wiring and proclivities can come to bite me in the ass.
It isn’t that way for everyone.
I keep forgetting that being kinky is still a big deal to some folks. In this day and age, when people seem so much more open minded and less judgmental, I keep forgetting that for some people, being kinky is a hazardous calling.
But it is.
This is a public service announcement for all my fellow kinksters out there. Unless you are so out that you tell your grandma about your fetlife parties and give zero fucks, please, I beg of you, show some caution. There are angry and bitter and vengeful people out there and they do not have your best interests at heart.
*If you have kids?
*If you have a job you don’t want to lose?
*If you do something with higher visibility?
*If you are in law enforcement or the military?
*If you have an angry ex?
*If you have someone that propositioned you and you turned them down?
Be very very careful. We kinksters tend to live in a blissful bubble, mainly surrounded by like-minded people that accept us and do not judge us, but not everyone is down with sharing that kink bubble with us.
The outings that happen from Fetlife can ruin families, cost you your job and affect your access to your own children. Unless you are completely out, I can not recommend that you put your face on your FL profile. No identifying details. Do not show your tattoos if you have any. Do not post the actual city you are in. Do not use your legal name. Do not use the same pics on FL that you have posted on a public social media site.
It saddens me that we kinksters have to be so cautious, but all you need is one upset person doing a screen shot of your FL profile and sending around the info to ruin your life. And those vengeful people ARE out there, make no mistake. Our natural kinky wiring can become the tool that bitter people try and use to take us down. Don’t give them anything to work with.
Stay safe my friends!
Class descriptions and presenter bio:
I have been presenting classes for 8 years now, and I realized that it was high time to have my presenter bio and all the classes I teach posted in one easy place. Please feel free to email me at email@example.com with any questions.
Classes currently taught:
*Kink 101: Coming out of the kinky closet
*Strap on play/pegging
*Oral sex 101: Learn how to lick (male and female)
*Give up the bootie! Anal play
*Putting poly into practice: an intro to polyamory
*Rough play and dominance
**Kink 101: Coming out of the kinky closet**
Kink has never been more widely discussed as it is today and is finally coming out of the shadows. Curious if you might be kinky? Wonder what exactly being kinky entails? Not sure how one gets started or how to safely explore the lifestyle? Wonder no more!
Lifestyler and educator Rain DeGrey presents a comprehensive and wide ranging class that covers all aspects of how to safely enter the scene and explore your darker desires. From how to meet your fellow kinksters, finding play parties to safety protocols and tips, this class has it all. Presented in a fun low pressure way with a question and answer period, this is the perfect intro class for curious newbies. Come with an open mind, leave with all the info you need to get started on your kinky journey.
**Pegging for pleasure: The ins and outs of strap-on play**
Whether you are a pegging virgin or really love dishing it out but just want to pick up a few more pointers and improve your game, this is the class for you! Strap-on aficionado and expert Rain DeGrey covers all the bases when it comes to strapping one on. How to find the right harness for you and your particular pegging needs, toys and attachments such as feeldoes and and vibrators, the care and cleaning of your toys and harnesses, choosing the best lubes and toys for your play and how to properly prepare oneself for receiving anal strap-on play will all be covered, as well as large toy insertions.
Pegging and strap-on play can be either intense or pleasurable depending on how you want to play, hardcore oral strap-on play is presented with tips to safely play rough.
This class covers oral, vaginal and anal strap on play tips, and there is a question and answer period as well as live demos of all of the concepts presented in the class. This is a pansexual class open to all genders and orientations, everyone is welcome to come get out and get their learn on!
**Oral sex 101: Learn to lick**
Love downstairs action? Are you a fan of the oral but want to to increase your skill set? Or are you afraid you suck at sucking? This is the class for you, no matter what your experience level is! Rain DeGrey, fan of all things oral, proudly presents “Oral Sex 101: Learn how to lick.”
From tips and techniques, covering multiple positions as well as power dynamics, incorporating anal, safer sex techniques to conquering deep-throat, this class has it all. Both male and female oral sex techniques will be covered, and there will be live demos of the concepts presented. Come prepared to learn and increase your oral skills in a fun, non-threatening environment. This is a pansexual class open to all genders and orientations, everyone is welcome!
**Feminine Dominance: The Joy of Topping**
The strength and beauty of a confident woman in control is an inspiring sight to behold. Throughout the ages strong women have always had an irresistible allure. Are you curious about Topping but uncertain about how to get started? Or are you looking to brush up on your skills to create a memorable and sizzling scene for you and your partner? Rain DeGrey goes over the steps to unlock your inner Domme.
Class will cover negotiation, how to create a strong scene, and various types of play including humiliation, strap-on, CBT, bondage, cross-dressing and more. This class is designed with the beginner/novice in mind. Don’t be shy, learn to own your strong female self!
**Give up the bootie! Anal play 101**
Always wanted to incorporate anal play into your sex life but uncertain where to start? Done some exploring but(t) want to take it to the next level? This is the class for you! Anal fanatic Rain DeGrey will walk you through the steps to unlock the joys of ass play. From rimming, enemas, butt plugs, prostate massage, fisting to strap-on play, this class will cover it all. Safety and cleaning, trying to negotiate an anal scene with someone inexperienced and how to make it feel good as opposed to “ouch!” often make people shy away from anal. Learn how much fun anal can be when it is done right!
**Putting poly into practice: An intro to polyamory**
Practitioner and devoted poly advocate Rain DeGrey proudly presents “Putting poly into practice.” Whether you have had some prior experience with poly or are totally new and not sure how to get started down the path, this is the class for you! Poly IS both possible and profoundly rewarding, come learn how to implement it into your own life.
Topics covered will include communication, negotiation, processing jealousy and other common emotions, along with a wide range of other subjects. Uncertain how to tell your partner your proclivities? Not feeling that fabled compersion? Come with an open mind and plenty of questions. Class will include practical tips, ways to discuss stumbling blocks with your partners and a question and answer period.
Breath play is a heavily stigmatized form of kinky/BDSM play. As a regular practitioner and advocate of demystification Rain DeGrey walks you through various forms of breath play that you can implement in your own life. Choking, HOM (hand over mouth), plastic bag play, hoods and waterboarding are all forms of breath play that can be explored in low risk ways.
This is a specialty class, please contact me for more details.
**Dominance and rough play**
Sometimes one can crave their dominance play a little…rougher. Not all BDSM play is elegant and carefully composed. It can also be raw and primal and full of abandon. But how does one go about engaging in rough play without accidentally causing unintended damage to their partner?
Wonder no more! This is the class for all rough play enthusiasts who want to explore the more intense side of dominance but are uncertain how to get started on that path. Rain DeGrey, who has extensively explored dominance and rough play on both sides of the coin, will show you how to safely explore your more primal side.
From negotiations to wrestling holds to safe areas of the body for impact and restraint, as well as what pitfalls to avoid, this class will cover it all. Live demos of concepts covered will be shown, as well as a question and answer portion. Come get your kink learning on and leave with some building blocks to discover your inner primal! This is a pansexual class open to all genders and orientations, and there will be something for everyone.
Rain DeGrey is an international educator, writer, presenter and performer that has been teaching kink and sex ed classes over the past half decade. After getting her start as a fetish model and Pro Domme, she was motivated to branch out into education, something she is extremely passionate about. She has taught at Kink.com, The Citadel, Pure Pleasures, Stormy Leather, Folsom Fringe, The Looking Glass, KinkAcadamy, PassionateU, Mission Control, Northwestern University and Boundcon in Germany on a wide variety on topics.
Her work has been featured in such places as Playboy TV’s “69 sexiest things to do before you die”, Seattle Erotic Arts Festival, The SF Fetish Ball, Exotic Erotic, Rope::Burn, Kink-e-zine and Femina Potens “The Art of Restraint”. Demystifying sexuality and presenting in a clear and humorous way are trademarks of her teaching style and she believes strongly in making sex ed fun.
For more info: Raindegrey.com, @raindegrey on Twitter, Raindegrey on Fetlife or email class inquiries at firstname.lastname@example.org